Texas vs Colorado

Eddie and Shep went to Houston to visit the Grandparents and Aunt JenJen.  Unlike the rest of the US, I had to work MLK Day and didn't want the Deckers to be a shuttle service to the airport all weekend, so I stayed.  I was fretting the loneliness and tears.  Low and behold, my friend Martina from Austin just happened to be in Colorado the same weekend and invited me out.  Well, it's much cheaper and shorter to fly to Denver than Houston so I Pricelined it and got a steal of a deal!  Ed, Shep, and I all left at around the same time so we went to the airport together.  I gulped back tears and dove into a book for distraction as I said goodbye.  But then I had an amazing time hanging with Martina and Ira and Kim and her boys.  We got to hang outside without concern for the air quality.  We chased the kids around their neighborhood playground and hockey rink.  Then just the girls went for a 5 mile trail run, then we all went to a brewery party, had a dance party, played a game, and drank a little too much beer. (6% will get you fast when you are used to 3.2%!)  And not to mention all the soul bearing.  Man, I sure do miss living in the same city as heart friends.  I know it takes time and lots of transition in Salt Lake, but it's just plain hard living without those lifelong friends that know your heart.  I was so challenged by Kim/Tim and Martina/Brent  in their can-do spirit. (Apparently I need some inspiration- I feel like a city-girl-weakling because I couldn't pick up our dead chicken and take it to the trash can.  Thankfully, Eddie didn't get the heebie jeebies on that one.)  I'm inspired to home-brew, build a drip system for the garden, somehow let our chicks free range for a little bit, play more board games, do more home projects myself instead of defer to Eddie, read books, and eat more veggies.  And of course, my small scale farming dream is in full force (minus the dirty work like disposing of dead chickens.)  Kim/Tim dream of farming too where they will have a restaurant in the middle of their farm- picnic table style.  We dream of the airstream corral retreat/conference center surrounded by gardens.  Martina dreams of mountain adventures.  We are all living our little farms dreams to an extent: Kim/Tim with their free ranging chickens and raised beds, Martina/Brent with their pigs/chickens, us with our gardens and now one lone chicken.  It will be exciting to see where God takes us over the years to fulfill our dreams either on earth or in heaven.  And I hope that our paths will cross in these future dreams as they come true.  If nothing else, perhaps an annual MLK Day meet up.

When I got home, Jane mentioned feeling at home in Redding with "her people."  She didn't feel special when around so many other international and S.Africans at her visit to Bethel.  She basked in that feeling of normalcy.  She was talking of the importance of being with "your people" so that God multiplies your giftings more than your own.  I felt the same when in Golden with Kim and Martina.  I didn't feel special or different.  I felt encouraged and inspired to create, take responsibility, and foster that which I'd been given such as land, home, Shep and my marriage.  Someday, I'd love to be around "my people" again where we encourage each other and spur each other on to greater glory.

In the meantime, Shep and Eddie came home and my heart regained its other half.  I sure did miss them and the rest of the family and trust that they had a great time in Houston.  These are "my people" now.  Back to the grind of work and school and choo choo's. (Shep is obsessed with Thomas the Tank Engine.)  We are embracing winter and getting outside to hike and run and refresh our souls-air polluted or not.  Eddie took care of the chicken and is in the process of building a box for the new chicks that we'll get soon.  Shep and I have been laughing a lot this week (and watching a lot of choo choo's.)  I started listening to a book about blessing your womb; it's very interesting so far.  More in a later post.  But now that a week has past and we are settled into the grind, life is really a roller coaster with its up's and down's but holding tight to God and his goodness to come on earth as it is in heaven.

Jackson Hole

We had a bit of a crummy New Years Eve and Day.  We weren't invited to any parties, and parties were had.  We felt friendless and alone.  But grateful for each other and Shep and mostly Jesus who is the closest friend.  Thankfully, we had a reservation at the Parkway Inn in Jackson to look forward to the next day.  So we drove up and stayed two nights.  Eddie skied Jackson Hole, a check off the ole bucket list.  Shep and I did a lovely snowshoe up the PuttPutt trail.  He cried the entire way back in my ear #notlovely.  Then I decided to drive to where I had heard there were Big Horn sheep in the area.  With Shep still crying, I drove the mile and bam! There they were, licking the ice and salt on our car, and with those creepy bronze eyes, peering deep into my soul, with only the glass to separate us.

It was awesome and slightly terrifying.  I had never seen one before and I was exhilarated!  But I also felt a bit trapped; they were literally surrounding me...and those eyes!!  I finally found an open space and slowly gunned it-that's not possible, but you get the idea-I escaped to say the least.  We got back to the quaint hotel and Shep immediately fell asleep.  Maybe all that screaming meant he was tired :)  I'll get the hang of this whole parenting thing some day.  The next day, we did a family snow shoe at Taggert Lake where supposedly the Tetons are the backdrop.  It was foggy and we never did see those damn Tetons.  Oh well.  Fortunately, we've been to Jackson and the Tetons several times before and know how truly amazing they are.  And, most likely we'll go again in the spring and/or summer.  Actually, I'd like to visit Yellowstone in October- less crowds, amazing gysers, etc.  Adventures abound for 2015!

2015 Goals

I just started going to a women's group on Wednesday.  I'm really hopeful that it will boot me into living a deeper life with God this year.  I was so nervous and shaky, maybe because I had a lot of coffee that morning without breakfast, or maybe it was the presence of the holy spirit, and/or anxiety/insecurity.  Either way, I was so thankful to have switched up my work schedule so that I could live a part of my week with these amazing women.
This week, we went around and shared our 2015 goals.  I had been thinking about them but had not completely formalized them.  So when speaking them out and now writing, I feel like they are more focus and more of a prayer.  So Lord, have your way in 2015!

* Trust the Lord for growing our family this year.  We would love to add another child this year, whether by becoming pregnant or by foster/adopting.

*I will potentially have more time to myself due to Eddie being in grad school and Shep starting a daycare. Some fun options for this extra time would be: get another part time job (nurse practitioner, cooking school instructor, volunteer at a community garden or refugee liaison), trail run more, clean our house, read books/Bible, do foster/adoption paperwork, study healthcare more, etc.  I'm excited to see what may unfold. My goal is to enjoy the slower/simpler time while I have it and pursue things that are life giving.

*Lead an exploratory mission trip to SE Asia with the Fellowship.

*Run MidMountain Marathon on Sat, Sept 12th if I'm not pregnant.

*Learn how to parent, teach, discipline, and love Shep better.  I know, it's not a measurable goal. Deal.

*Incorporate fasting into my life regularly.

*Do the Deliverance Class through the Fellowship.

So there we go.  Again, I'm looking forward to seeing how this year will play out and all that God has in store.

Wanton

This Christmas season has been so much fun.  Shep is at such a fun stage (although I think every stage so far has been fun) at almost two years old.  He is learning new words each day, discovering  how his body works and moves, and developing opinions more and more.  Today, he enjoys time-outs and oranges and stairs.  Miraculously, he keeps hats on which is quite fortunate because we have been outside a couple times this week and the temperature is in the single digits.  We have lost all but one of his pacifiers so we are narrowing down on this, but I have to admit, I kinda like them.  They really do soothe him when he bonks something, in the car, and for sleeping.  I'm nervous about some upcoming trips without a paci. Speaking of the car, that's what I wanted to talk about.  He's become quite the chatter box in the car.  It's like he has a captive audience so he just goes for it.  The other day, we were driving back from Grandpa's house in Zionsville to Jeff and Emma's place, a twenty min drive, and we couldn't get a word in edgewise.  Thankfully, he was all happy talk.  The question is, what was he talking about?!  He has been very excited about Christmas lights this season and likes to plug in our tree lights and our outside lights.  He says, "Lights on."  So he could have been saying that on repeat.  Or may it was, "All done."  He seemed happy, but it was late and he was ready for bed. In reality, it sounded like, "Wanton."  So that's what we decided it was.  Talking incessantly for twenty straight minutes about a wanton.  I'm pretty sure he's never had one and I'm not even sure I know what it is myself, but yup, "wanton" was his go-to word this Christmas season.  Jesus is the one true reason for the season and wanton is a far distant second.

And Then She Wiggled My Wenis

I'm zero for four.  We get these BOGO coupons in the mail for the Student Massage place downtown.  We get so excited every time.  Who wouldn't get excited for a $12.50 massage?!  But it's on a first come, first serve basis only on the weekends.  So we have to plan it out so that Shep is not neglected. So this weekend, we went on Saturday at exactly 8 am when it opened.  I have no idea how this worked out, but there were already 50 people in line.  So we went to Ruth's instead; Eddie had chicken fried steak eggs benedict.  It was heaven on earth.  So we tried again for the massage on Sunday morning before church.  I went and waited for about an hour before I got in.  Not bad.  I decided to go to Gourmandise down the street while I waited and get some Italian cookies; it was closed.  Then I went to Nostalgia for some coffee and a pastry (just like Europe!)  They had gluten free and vegan pastries.  Fail!  So I go back with just coffee for my "massage."

Let me back up, in the past, I've had three lotionings from the Students.  Every time I ask for a deep tissue massage, but low and behold, I get a lotioning.  It's sad.  This time was different.  Half of the time, Student forgot to even use lotion!  But anyway, Student starts with my left elbow. She spent a good, full minute rubbing gently on it. A minute is a long time.  Then Student moved one inch down and spent another whole minute gently rubbing back and forth on my ulna.  It was weird. Not even slightly good.  I debated stopping the whole thing right then, but thought that it could only get better, right?  Welllll, the lotioning continued.  She asked no less than seven times how the pressure was and I responded every. single. time. that she could go deeper.  But nope, no change.  Student didn't even touch my lower back, which I wrongly assumed was a basic part of any massage.  And I was slightly bummed because I had worn cute bundies that said "Stay Cool" on the butt that I thought we might have a laugh about.  Student did manage to really drive a knuckle into my arches which have been sore since the day Shep was born. So there's that.  For the grande finale, Student had me flip over and then went straight to right arm.  And then for a second time, she wiggled my wenis. I stayed cool, thanked her, and left.

Spontaneity

We still got it!  Despite having a toddler we can still be spontaneous occasionally.  

Joel had a 40 th birthday party planned for over a month ago in Chicago and much of my family was planning on attending. I desperately wanted to go but flights were in the $600 range. So we planned on going camping in the Sawtooth mountains of Idaho instead. But I confess, I was pouty about it. It's not often that I get to see both sides of my family in one place making it easy to catch up w lots of people in one trip. 

A coworker asked to switch around  our Tuesday  schedule and a glimmer of hope resurrected on my heart. Flights are usually cheaper on Tuesdays so I had to check again, for the millionth time, for a reasonable flight and found one less than $600. Still expensive but Ed and I agreed it was worth it. 

And it was!! 

Shep and I ended up with a red eye and Funcle Choppy graciously picked us up early the next morning. We got to sleep for an hour before going over to my dad and Jean's for brunch with Jeff and Emma and the kids. It just so happened that my aunt and uncle from Mesquite were in town! How cool that we got to see even more family than expected! Then Dad, Jeff, Shep, and I all headed up to Chicago. It was a sweet time connecting just the three of us.  We arrived early and Shep and I surprised everyone. So fun! It really was so fun to get to see lots of my family. 

And then that night we got to stay with my aunt Kate, Nick, and Joe which was a delight. I did miss seeing my other aunts, Pat and Ginny. Then we drove back over to Joel's and visited more with the hangovered clan before driving back with my mom. We had to stop at the dairy farm for cheese, ice cream, and French onion soup, of course. Then, we had a whole day to hang with Emma and Mary, Ethan, and Clara just doing summer stuff- riding bikes, playing at the park, chalking sidewalks, swimming, and cooking out. It was awesome. 

Then Another early morning trip to the airport to wrap up the spontaneity. What a surprise gift to get to be with my family!  It was a bummer that Eddie wasn't able to come, and he was dearly missed, but I am so thankful to have gotten to go.  

The Qincenera Commercial

We've been "blessed" with a 2 night stay at The Little America, a swanky hotel about a mile from our home. This came about because our neighbor does props and finds locations for commercials and asked to see inside our house for such a purpose. I had never met this neighbor before so thought it was kinda weird but went with it. He ended up coming back with all the producers and artists to make a decision about using our home for a commercial about a poor Latina family who pulls together to throw their daughter a quincenera, a 15th birthday party that is somewhat of a right of passage for Hispanic girls. 

It's been a bit more hectic than we anticipated. I've worked my two days that I usually have off so I have not been able to clean (at least that has been my excuse:) so I feel super embarrassed that tons of  people have been in my dusty house using our nasty bathroom. and we haven't been able to quite enjoy the time at the hotel as much as I wanted. I just feel so rushed and scattered. And bouncy from jumping back to the house to get work clothes and make sure Willie is ok and fed and the garden is watered and get a quick breakfast before heading off to work. 

Oh and then we bought a truck which is like a million steps of logistics in actually getting the truck. But we finally got a truck!! 

And then there's the hotel. Within the span of two hours, Shep had managed to spill a whole jar of apricot jam onto the carpet ( I told him that hurt my feelings. He had no sympathy :(), spilled poop from his diaper onto the carpet, unwrapped a roast beef wrap onto the carpet, scribbled in pen on the white bedspread, and broke a glass. Oh and refused a nap. So we went swimming in the pool and giggled and giggled and giggled. That made things all better. 

Then on the way home to switch out the cars and check on Willie, I got pulled over by the police for outdated plates. In the one mile from our house!! I try to explain the weird situation about the commercial and us staying in a hotel and not having a screwdriver to put the plates on that I got just two hours before.  thankfully, he had compassion and was intrigued about the commercial. 

So we get back into our home to find all kinda things broken and out of place. "Um Babe, do you know where the diapers are?"  "I can't get in, the door handle is broken." "Um, were you wrapping Christmas presents in the bathroom? Cause I found the wrapping paper." 

But the redeeming parts of the commercial are many: a house cleaner came and cleaned our home. I feel the dust of my soul has lifted with that cleaning.  And the frame to the Flamenca singer was broken and they are fixing it with a nice frame with glass. Wow. They certainly can't replace the sentimentality of our broken Moroccan plates that my Kholmes gave us for our wedding, but they are trying. And I appreciate that immensely. 

I'm excited to see this commercial and be inspired by the message. 

I've realized that I've become a bit more attached to "stuff" than I ever have been in my life and more than I really want to be.  Lord you are enough for me. Money and stuff can't buy me your peace. 

Oh and I might hire a house cleaner more regularly.